Let us Stand on the promises, even if it is just ONE

**Content warning.  These are my brain waves and its long.  Thanks in advance for loving me enough to read it.

You know, I dont really know what Facebook is for, but Im going to take a leap here.  Those of my 465 friends here on this thing, some know me well, others not so much.  So some of you know that me and my sister always have to have a plan.  My dad taught us that a man without a plan, was a man without a future.  Im not a man, granted, but I think he was telling us to make sure we thought before we jumped. I didnt pick up on that idea well.... and Unfortunately, I have inherited the Wanda Elaine Anderson trait of worry to the enth degree!  I worry about everything.  Right now, well a few minutes ago, I was worrying how I would be able to get my nails fixed, because they are starting to hurt me.  I take good care of my nails, but I have been so broke fixing financial things that should have been taken care of by other sources of financial means, that I am watching every penny as it rolls out of my hand! I dont have a car.  Its too hot to walk. Do I dare worry my kids to take me, my friends?  its a real NEED?? I go no where, see no one but my doctor and whoever comes to visit me in my room.  Why do I really need to worry about them?  But they hurt.

Most of you know I am a Christian, and the Lord has told us over and over and over again, not to worry, he has our back.  Im behind on my daily devotions by about six weeks, Ive been sick, unmotivated and did not make it a priority, unfortunately.  However, I always learn at the right time.


After Jesus was crucified, the women went after the Sabbath to prepare Jesus' body.  On the way, they were worried about WHO was going to roll that big stone away from the tomb.  They couldnt move it, their physical bodies did not have the strength.  When they got there, the stone was rolled away already!  Then, of course, they freaked out because Jesus was missing!?? and then an Angel had to appear to them to calm them down.  God is so awesome like that!!  Isnt that the way we are though??  We worry worry and then we find out the Lord already had it fixed in the first place, and then we start worrying again, about some new awful thing, even though He has proved his goodness to us just minutes earlier AND the Word says it is so!  When do we learn??  Im at a huge crossroad in my life right now, and all of the street signs are telling me major pain is involved and it doesnt matter which road I choose, they are all "good", but painful, choice.  I didnt have a plan and I jumped before I knew there were sharp rocks at the bottom of a few of my decisions, others, well, are just life.  When do we start trusting that all those horrible street signs make us who we are?  Some decisions arent the "right" ones, but  if we keep our hearts directed at LOVE, and realized that love is a Decision, not a feeling, and trust in the Lord God with all our hearts, and lean NOT unto our own understanding.......that it will be ok.  Really ok.  I found this tonight, and to whoever reads this, thanks for caring enough for me,  to read my wanderings....

In today's bright sunlight breaking
Leave tomorrow's cares alone---
Spoil not present joys while asking
"Who shall Roll away the Stone?"
Oft, before we've faced the trial
We have come with joy to own,
Angels have from Heaven descended,
And have rolled away the Stone --- Anonymous  

Ill pray for you my friend.....I know I need it too!

To the end of 2011.....

I cannot believe it is here.

A whole entire year over, and a new one to be born. I think Im supposed to plan or create some kind of plan for the year...so I will have some direction. My bestest friend said yesterday that she was planning her new horizons. I so admire and love her. She seems to always have it together. Even so, I know that even she has her moments of "Uh? really? Now what?" Those who fail to plan, plan to fail, she said. I so agree with that statement but unfortunately, I always lose sight of my plan before some other "thing" happens.....LIKE...potato, Squirrel....I saw a rock....How did I end up in Arizona???? That would possibly be me, however, no matter how great my plans in this life have been, I always seem to never quite make it. I dont say this to be whaawhaa.....but just matter-o-factually the way it is... I believe in my own heart that it is the way it is because it is supposed to be this way, and the "me" that has been formed would not necessarily be the "me" I am, if my plans had been attained. So this year Im going to take a different perspective and try to just relax.


Since I was a little girl, I have always felt I was never good enough. My hair wasnt pretty because I couldnt have a haircut, my dad didnt like the idea of us girls cutting our hair. I couldnt go certain places because it wasnt allowed. I thought I wasnt pretty, as the other girls were. I thought my grades were not good enough, though I ranked I believe 19th in my graduating class of 189 people...not quite top ten percent, but pretty darn close. When I married, I wanted babies so badly, the year we waited was torture. Then the children started coming and then...I wasnt measuring up. Especially when my oldest pulled the fire alarm during church services. He had to be taken out because he wanted to run up and down the isles of the church.....My house was never clean enough. OH and JOY school, the co op preschool that rotated from house to house with our preschool aged kids....lets not forget about that. My snack I sent never was as clever, my house was SOOOO never clean and my meals were burned. Then, guess what? The family I so dreamed of dissolved. Poof! Oh well, start that plan over again. This cycle continued .....Up until about 2007, I really honestly did worry about what OTHERS thought or measured me to be AS SUCH. In 2007 I started to get sick....and I had to realize what mattered most were things that could not be counted, changed or measured. Love mattered most.

One thing I never have had a problem with is knowing that GOD loved me. That I am specially and wonderfully made into a person that HE loves. I didnt realized how profound that was, until I heard Joseph*s Lullaby by MercyMe this year. I think it came out last year, but it just stunned me and made me realize how blind we are in this life, leading each other. Just think how much FAITH God had in Mary and Joseph, to send his only child to be born as an infant, helpless..... held, fed, changed, carried into Egypt and then out again, taught to walk, talk and read, write....all the things that mommy and daddys do. You cant "plan" how to parent a child. It just happens.


So this year Im just going to try to concentrating on keeping my path narrow, to love the LORD with all my heart, and that should spill over onto the path and goals that are righteous and true and kind, and what He wants for me. For God does have a PLAN for me. Even if I cant seem to stick to one. God is much bigger than religion, and Im not going to measure myself anymore as to the world's goals. Just be Rhea. The name that is lovingly called to me by my Savior. I know that nickname is what He knows me by.

Wouldnt it be wonderful if 2012 didnt finish...and the Savior came and took us home before 2013??? What an answer to prayer that would be!

God Bless everyone near and far and remember that its not the PLAN that will get you where you want to be, it is the intent that will keep you moving there.

Thoughts about our body.....

I'm not drop dead gorgeous... I haven't gotten an amazing figure or a flat stomach... I'm far from being considered a model, but I'm me... I eat junk food, love to wear my PJ's, and no make-up... I'm random and crazy, And I don't pretend to be someone I'm not... I am who I am, love me or not, I wont change ME!!!!

Im almost HOME...will be there Wednesday. God is good all the time, and we have exactly the body he wants us to have. Its what we do with them that is o...ur choice. I choose to follow the path that the LORD has called for me. Sometimes our body is made to extract compassion from others and have them learn the simple gift of unconditional love, Sometimes it could be a body that has so much stregnth that one person can carry a load of many, and many depend upon them. Sometimes this body is told to stay or move. I was told to move in 2009 starting in January. I kept telling my mom and dad it didnt make sense, but I felt there was a big change coming in my life. I told my kids that too. They will remember it at times, other times all they can remember is the moving truck being loaded and momma going away. Sometimes it doesnt make sense...quitting an awesome job....leaving kids behind....leaving other things you are supposed to be committed to. But I guess Im a little like Andrew and Peter....I just knew...and I left everything standing where it was. My first son is named Andrew for a Reason. He was the first one God blessed me with...and one of the first that Jesus chose to follow him. I pray for my Andrew every day